Hi,
I never knew you. I doubt you'd ever know who I am. We'll just be these nameless girls we already are in each other's life.
But first, I want you to know that I don't blame you for anything. You never knew. It was the asshole of OUR boyfriend - who can't set his timeline straight - who was the one to blame.
I'm writing this letter to tell you a story.
No, it's not to break things off between you two, but to remind you to always be careful and remember to love yourself.
We met at a very unexpected time.
Karma really does strike back and now I believe it.
Would you believe that we met through the introduction of my previous boyfriend whom I never got closure with?
Now I realize I hurt him a lot for leaving him in the dark when I began a relationship with our guy. The betreyal, the pain, I know I hurt him a lot.
But I still went on. I was comfortable, I was happy. All the effort and time that I never got from my past relationship, he gave it to me.
But deep in my gut, I still feel the love we shared was temporary. I just didn't belong with him. I knew whatever we had is something borrowed.
Until I began opening my eyes to the possibilities of having a future together. I decided and convinced myself that he was now my reality. And magically, it just happened. I fell in love.
It's not about all the good things that I see in him but as well as those things that I hate yet I still accepted. I turned a blind eye on his hot temper, his not so tall height, his oily face and pimples and his tiny..... just kidding, nevermind.
But beyond all those, I loved him for being a good son. I can see how he really loves his family...I knew he loved them more than me. Which is why I know he values being accepted by the family of the person he loves. In that case, he found that in you. :) Sadly, it's just something I don't get to have a control over.
He's also a very thoughtful guy. Though money-wise, he's really practical. He'd rather spend money on food, rather than buy roses to please you. But that's not a flaw. We should understand he's working hard for his future and he's just wise to know the value of what he's worked for.
Overall, he's a kind-hearted individual. He may hide behind his mask of an arrogant and proud tough guy, but behind it, you'll see his sweet golden heart.
I wanted to write and list down everything I should hate about him yet I always go forgetting it, especially these days when losing him is the most painful thing that ever happened. Maybe its my way of coping with the situation. I'm just holding on to the beautiful memories that it overshadowed all the negative things I was seeing in him during the time when I felt like almost giving up. You'll definitely appreciate someone's worth when you've already lost them.
So promise me girl, don't hurt him even more. Make sure he gets the love that he deserves, understand him in his weakest moments and love him wholeheartedly for who he is. And if you're having doubts, remember he's a beautiful person inside and I loved him just as that.
For all the memories and the lessons I learned, I am so grateful I got to experience having Dexter Calamba in my life.
He's worth it.
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